For my sister-in-law, her rating of men was 99% least attractive, 0.99% acceptably attractive and 0.01% most attractive. Most attractive being certain especially talented performers who don't know she exists. When my sister-in-law was in her 20s she would have dates with some of the 0.99%, but these men were never that interested in her.
For my sister-in-law, her rating of men was 99% least attractive, 0.99% acceptably attractive and 0.01% most attractive. Most attractive being certain especially talented performers who don't know she exists. When my sister-in-law was in her 20s she would have dates with some of the 0.99%, but these men were never that interested in her.
The crazy thing is that the negative vibes my sister-in-law had about the 99% of men she found unattractive oozed from her persona. All the more crazier as my sister-in-law was not gifted with the looks to be in a position of being picky about men, but she absolutely was! And so it is that she has never married.
Fortunately, my wife was less picky and somehow I got her to fall for me.
I’m 55 and very near triple digits. Obviously not in incel land. I asked my girlfriend about this chart in bed last night. I think of myself as normal and not particularly attractive. I have definite negatives in my own mind. Her response was that I exude masculinity and a protector/doer kind of alpha vibe. Not work boots and jeans but obviously not soft handed either. I’m a slight bit dickish too but in a way she finds acceptable. Like the guy who won’t take bs and will argue the point when someone is being a douche while out. And I’m better looking than I think I am. Also, I’m tall (6’6”) and intelligent, and that would break the whole deal if the last wasn’t true. She’s actually a librarian and would find a dumb guy unacceptable.
The conclusion I had to come to is that I’m blessed and guys who didn’t get this suite need some help, which is why I mention it. Much of this stuff came down to how I was raised and trained myself. I’d also point out that she had two kids (as did I, separately), so her attitudes were not much like your sister in law, though her ex husband was dominating to the point she calls him a narcissist. Kind of a ‘pick me’ girl, as many (most?) of the girls were back when I was a kid.
I still think going for the masculine vibe would be the way I’d go if I were 25 again. And the women like your sister in law are going to be having a lot of cats. I feel bad for them, they’d probably have been good mothers, but they ruled themselves out.
I think the masculine thing is a big unspoken problem with a modern generation of men raised by women. They either take on the toxic animal "thug" persona, or they are soft. Anger coming out of such "soft" men terrifies women. The opposite of that, men in control, able to to resist visible anger but also able to withstand external force, that is something women seem to like. What is amusing is that women supposedly wanted sensitive men when I was young (1990's), but no one ever say that in person. I almost feel like it was some kind of advertising policy that became widely held, but not realistic.
I'm surprised how my comment resonated with readers. My SIL is a very good hearted person. But there was something instinctive in her that created friction with most men. As she has aged she has generally become less social with everyone. But I don't think she has made a new guy friend in many, many years - her best male friend is a long time neighbor, but she doesn't socialize with him.
My wife was completely opposite. She is very comfortable around men and enjoyed dating, not for any romantic need, but she enjoyed the socializing.
I happened to catch her right when she was wanting to have a more serious relationship. I demonstrated the masculine attributes of being modestly athletic, competitive but fair and of seeking a serious occupation / steady income. Thirty five years we are happily married and best friends.
It amazes me how two sisters can have such different dispositions!
I'm happy for you. I had poor relationships for other reasons until I got some recovery from codependency in my 50s. Life is good now, you always wish you were ready for the message earlier though.
Maybe, but to me I look around and I see guys who were more attractive according to the criteria I apply to women I guess - body shape, symmetrical features, good hair. That must not be the criteria they are using.
Many women would agree with you. But if even 2% of women have a preference for it, there are only like 0.2% of men that tall, so they each have 10 women who'd really like them
Absolutely. I think over prioritizing height, and not realizing that there's often easy alpha in searching through short men for a short king, is a clear cut case of mild irrationality
Dude, you are 6-6. You are near the top of the charts in the one category that nearly all woman want and filter on. Why you would declare yourself unattractive is baffling to me.
Because 6’3-4” is a realistically attractive height for men and this chap is into freakish territory at 6’6”. Difficulties in almost all aspects of daily life at this height. Only attractive to unusually tall women, that is over 5’10”. The average height for women in North America is 5’6” and we get a sore neck from looking up past 6’3” all the time.
For my sister-in-law, her rating of men was 99% least attractive, 0.99% acceptably attractive and 0.01% most attractive. Most attractive being certain especially talented performers who don't know she exists. When my sister-in-law was in her 20s she would have dates with some of the 0.99%, but these men were never that interested in her.
The crazy thing is that the negative vibes my sister-in-law had about the 99% of men she found unattractive oozed from her persona. All the more crazier as my sister-in-law was not gifted with the looks to be in a position of being picky about men, but she absolutely was! And so it is that she has never married.
Fortunately, my wife was less picky and somehow I got her to fall for me.
I’m 55 and very near triple digits. Obviously not in incel land. I asked my girlfriend about this chart in bed last night. I think of myself as normal and not particularly attractive. I have definite negatives in my own mind. Her response was that I exude masculinity and a protector/doer kind of alpha vibe. Not work boots and jeans but obviously not soft handed either. I’m a slight bit dickish too but in a way she finds acceptable. Like the guy who won’t take bs and will argue the point when someone is being a douche while out. And I’m better looking than I think I am. Also, I’m tall (6’6”) and intelligent, and that would break the whole deal if the last wasn’t true. She’s actually a librarian and would find a dumb guy unacceptable.
The conclusion I had to come to is that I’m blessed and guys who didn’t get this suite need some help, which is why I mention it. Much of this stuff came down to how I was raised and trained myself. I’d also point out that she had two kids (as did I, separately), so her attitudes were not much like your sister in law, though her ex husband was dominating to the point she calls him a narcissist. Kind of a ‘pick me’ girl, as many (most?) of the girls were back when I was a kid.
I still think going for the masculine vibe would be the way I’d go if I were 25 again. And the women like your sister in law are going to be having a lot of cats. I feel bad for them, they’d probably have been good mothers, but they ruled themselves out.
I think the masculine thing is a big unspoken problem with a modern generation of men raised by women. They either take on the toxic animal "thug" persona, or they are soft. Anger coming out of such "soft" men terrifies women. The opposite of that, men in control, able to to resist visible anger but also able to withstand external force, that is something women seem to like. What is amusing is that women supposedly wanted sensitive men when I was young (1990's), but no one ever say that in person. I almost feel like it was some kind of advertising policy that became widely held, but not realistic.
I'm surprised how my comment resonated with readers. My SIL is a very good hearted person. But there was something instinctive in her that created friction with most men. As she has aged she has generally become less social with everyone. But I don't think she has made a new guy friend in many, many years - her best male friend is a long time neighbor, but she doesn't socialize with him.
My wife was completely opposite. She is very comfortable around men and enjoyed dating, not for any romantic need, but she enjoyed the socializing.
I happened to catch her right when she was wanting to have a more serious relationship. I demonstrated the masculine attributes of being modestly athletic, competitive but fair and of seeking a serious occupation / steady income. Thirty five years we are happily married and best friends.
It amazes me how two sisters can have such different dispositions!
I'm happy for you. I had poor relationships for other reasons until I got some recovery from codependency in my 50s. Life is good now, you always wish you were ready for the message earlier though.
>Also, I’m tall (6’6”)
I think you're really under rating that. Being that tall is not a footnote to getting triple digits.
Maybe, but to me I look around and I see guys who were more attractive according to the criteria I apply to women I guess - body shape, symmetrical features, good hair. That must not be the criteria they are using.
I honestly would say that's *too* tall. I think anything over 6'4" is although it wouldn't be a deal-killer. But, I'm also okay with short guys, too.
Many women would agree with you. But if even 2% of women have a preference for it, there are only like 0.2% of men that tall, so they each have 10 women who'd really like them
I think women are silly to focus so much on height. So many short great guys, as long as they don't have Short Guys Disease!
https://www.growsomelabia.com/post/what-s-so-terrible-about-short-guys-ladies
Absolutely. I think over prioritizing height, and not realizing that there's often easy alpha in searching through short men for a short king, is a clear cut case of mild irrationality
Dude, you are 6-6. You are near the top of the charts in the one category that nearly all woman want and filter on. Why you would declare yourself unattractive is baffling to me.
Because 6’3-4” is a realistically attractive height for men and this chap is into freakish territory at 6’6”. Difficulties in almost all aspects of daily life at this height. Only attractive to unusually tall women, that is over 5’10”. The average height for women in North America is 5’6” and we get a sore neck from looking up past 6’3” all the time.